The Hornswaggling Noble Pen Newsletter, October 14th 2010

Noble Pen Meeting

October 14th, 2010
The Family Restaurant formerly known as Happy Chef, 1906 Blairs Ferry Rd NE, Cedar Rapids

Those who are regular followers of the doings of Arthur Dent  may have  received  an  impression of his character and habits which, while it includes the truth  and,  of  course,  nothing  but  the truth,  falls  somewhat  short,  in its composition, of the whole truth in all its glorious aspects.

And the reasons for this are  obvious.  Editing,  selection,  the need  to  balance  that  which  is interesting with that which is relevant and cut out all the tedious happenstance.

Like this for instance. “Arthur Dent went to bed. He went up  the stairs, all fifteen of them, opened the door, went into his room, took off his shoes and socks and then all the rest of his clothes one  by one and left them in a neatly crumpled heap on the floor.  He put on his pyjamas, the blue ones with the stripe.  He  washed his  face  and  hands,  cleaned  his teeth, went to the lavatory, realized that he had once again got this all in the wrong  order, had  to wash his hands again and went to bed. He read for fifteen minutes, spending the first ten minutes of that  trying  to  work out  where  in the book he had got to the previous night, then he turned out the light and within a minute or so more was asleep.

“It was dark. He lay on his left side for a good hour…

It’s guff. It doesn’t advance the action. It makes for  nice  fat books  such  as  the  American  market thrives on, but it doesn’t actually get you anywhere. You don’t, in short, want to know.

–Douglas Adams, So Long and Thanks For All the Fish

Editor’s note: Condensed as it is, this quote is a little longer than usual, but it’s a good example of when not to show everything. If you wish to read the whole passage, it is the beginning of Chapter 25.


Colin joined us.

At 126,000 words, Kris finished her novel on Tuesday at 1:30 in the morning, which is probably one of the better things a person can be doing at that time of day.

Dylan finished the first draft of Flight, but he was voted out of his writing contest and forced to burn his bikini top.

Tony’s story The Tunnels of St. Lucy’s will make an appearance in a Sams Dot publication, but his most recent flash fiction piece was rejected.

Ciuin has gotten a professional referral to two agents. Perhaps soon, people around the world will be crying like a little girl with a skinned knee, as I did as I read the final chapters.


I was going to show you How to Become an Writer – The Loser’s Guide, but it hit too close to home.

This is how a writer applies for a job: Hunter S. Thompson’s 1958 cover letter to the Vancouver Sun.

Some guy in South American won the Noble Prize in Literature but OMG THE NEW YORK POST FOUND THE HAND MODEL FROM THE TWILIGHT COVER. I’m speechless.



Okay, I have completed part of of my plan for scheduling in rounds, and hopefully, the new schedule will make sense and seem fair to everyone. I put a (1) next to the people who asked for slots in round one and a (2) next to people who asked for a slot last night.

I still might have to shift around round 2 a bit, because I have not heard back from Tyree who is out of state.

Upcoming Schedule

October 14th

October 21

October 28

November 4
Educational – Looking for Volunteer

November 11th
(2) Ciuin
(2) Kris

November 18th
(2) Nick
(2) Bob
(2) Dylan

November 25th – Off for Thanksgiving.

December 2nd
(2) Shannon
(2) Dylan
Educational- Need Volunteer

December 9th
(2) Tyree
(2) Dave
(2) Tony

Keep Writing, Penites.