Noble Pen Meeting

April 1, 2010
Happy Chef, 1906 Blairs Ferry Rd NE, Cedar Rapids

We have front row seats for this Theater of Mass Destruction. The Demolitions Committee of Project Mayhem wrapped the foundation columns of ten buildings with blasting gelatin. In two minutes, primary charges will blow base charges, and those buildings will be reduced to smoldering rubble. I know this because Tyler knows this.
–Fight Club

Victories

Dylan received a helpful rejection, which is beter than an unhelpful rejection and not as good as an unhelpful acceptance, and better than a hastily scribbled note hung on the door of a bed and breakfast in Saskatchewan.

Dylan also re-published his novel as an e-book. Mummy fetishists everywhere rejoice!

Ian is having his students critique is worksheets. Their critiques have included phrases such as “Reply Hazy, Try Agan” and “Outlook Not So Good.”

News

Jeff Somers has put up a youtube video about the average day in the life of a professional author.

Housekeeping

I could not get in contact with Ciuin about this week, so assuming she has a backlog of homework after her illness, I’m going to give Dylan a slot this week and put her on for the 8th.

Upcoming Schedule

Thursday, April 1st. Happy Chef.

Noble Pen Meeting

March 25, 2010
Happy Chef, 1906 Blairs Ferry Rd NE, Cedar Rapids

“It is a little known fact the the so-called “Law of Gravity” was actually one of Sir Isaac “shecky” Newton’s best practical jokes, and it was such a wonderful knee-slapper that generations of teachers have devoted themselves to keeping the hoax alive. In truth, there is no such thing as “gravity.” Rather, the Great Earth Goddess sucks.”
–Bruce Bethke, Headcrash

“I am chaos. I am the substance from which your artists and scientists build rhythms. I am the spirit with which your children and clowns laugh in happy anarchy. I am chaos. I am alive, and I tell you that you are free.”
–Eris, goddess of discord, from the Principia Discordia

Victories

Ciuin rewrote the front page copy for the IARMAC website. I just wish she wouldn’t cuss so much.

News

Here is a chart of what some famous writers did as day jobs. These guys were lightweights compared to Stephen King’s experience doing commercial laundry. Speaking of which, I think I’m going to go be sick now.

If you’ve been following the story of Canadian author Peter Watts, he was convicted of assaulting a federal officer today.

Mike Swift of the San Jose Mercury has a succinct article on the Google Books controversy.

Housekeeping

Notice some schedule changes two and three weeks out. Dylan, I bumped you up a week, I hope that’s okay.

Someone remind me to be better about getting the names of the pieces instead of just reserving the slot for the author. I’ve been really bad about that lately, sorry.

Upcoming Schedule

Thursday, March 25th. Happy Chef.

Noble Pen Meeting

March 18, 2010
Happy Chef, 1906 Blairs Ferry Rd NE, Cedar Rapids

When asked, “How do you write?” I invariably answer, “one word at a time.”
–Stephen King

He’s an alien, for Christ sake. His Kyrptonian biological makeup is enhanced by earth’s yellow sun. If Lois gets a tan the kid could kick right through her stomach. Only someone like Wonder Woman has a strong enough uterus to carry his kid. The only way he could bang regular chicks is with a kryptonite condom. That would kill him.
–Brodie, Mallrats

Victories

Bill did some research on his new science fiction novel despite my insistance that facts are meaningless in the future.

Wendy is applying for a scholarship to the Philadelphia Writer’s Conference. I think it’s a football scholarship.

I E-mailed an editor, who may be dead.

News

Lynn Viehl has a funny blog entry on diseases you can catch from other writers.

Jennifer Hubbard has a short piece on tension.

Upcoming Schedule

Thursday, March 18th. Happy Chef, 7pm Welcome and Victories, 7:30pm Critique

Noble Pen Meeting

March 11, 2010
Happy Chef, 1906 Blairs Ferry Rd NE, Cedar Rapids

I didn’t get where I am today by selling ice cream tasting of bookends, pumice stone and West Germany.
–The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin

Bill: “I had a BM Stacker at Burger King once.”
Mike: “I think you mean a BK Stacker.”
Bill: “I stand by what I said.”
–RiffTrax, Transformers

Victories

Lena had a terrific letter to the editor in the Gazette about how Tiger Wood’s private life should be between him, his wife, the thousands of women he’s had sex with, and the millions of people he has emailed pictures of his genitalia. (I printed mine out and had it autographed at last year’s Bridgestone Invitational.)

Bill and I both read Ciuin’s reader copy of Petty Theft in a week.  I am too awed by how awesome it make up a joke, so instead, watch this cool video.

News

The Guardian has an interesting piece where they have put together different authors’ tips on writing.

Penguin has a pretty cool video about their upcoming interactive books.

In case you didn’t see the link up above, Lena’s letter is here.

Housekeeping

I just wanted to thank everyone for being so openminded about the new critique method. I thought this week was the best one yet.

I am assigning the 18th as a round table, so think about anything you may want to discuss.

The 25th is open right now.

Upcoming Schedule

Thursday, March 11th. Happy Chef, 7pm Welcome and Victories, 7:30pm Critique